Lagrimas
by Pita1013
Summary: There are many different kinds of blindness (post-ep for Theef)


Title: Lágrimas (1/1)  
Author: Pita1013  
Rating: G  
Classification: A  
Spoilers: Theef, Millennium  
Keywords: none  
Summary: There are many types of blindness.  
  
Archive anywhere  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine sob. They belong to DD and GA and  
CC and all the folks at 1013 and Fox.  
  
Author's Notes/Intro: Lágrimas is Spanish for "tears".  
  
**********  
Lágrimas  
  
  
It was the first time he had ever heard her scream in her  
sleep. It had him out of bed and into jeans before the  
last echoes faded into the ether of night.  
  
Mulder pounded on the door to her motel room. When he didn't  
get an answer immediately, he broke the offending barrier  
open. The flimsy lock popped with a minimum of damage, he  
noted absently, sending a brief thanks to whomever watched  
over his expense reports.  
  
Then his eyes fixed on Scully, and all other thoughts fled.  
  
She was still asleep, thrashing on the bed and beating the  
sheets with clenched fists. Her eyes weren't just shut; they  
were clamped shut as tightly as her hands. And all through  
the tumult there was a steady stream of barely-intelligible  
words.   
  
"No... please, don't make me do this... please!" Then a  
second heart-wrenching cry.  
  
Mulder sat carefully at the side of her bed. With one hand  
he started to stroke her tensed arm. She stilled a little  
at the touch, brow furrowing with concentration.   
  
Eyes still closed, she whispered, "Mulder..."  
  
"I'm right here Scully," he murmured back. "You need to   
wake up now, okay?" He moved his hand down to her fist and  
unwrapped her fingers. They closed over his hand as soon   
as he moved to let go.  
  
"Scully, wake up!" he commanded, louder, to no avail. She  
uttered yet another shriek.  
  
Finally, he resorted to drastic measures. He removed his   
hand from hers and stood up.  
  
That did it.  
  
With a whimper, Scully sat up, eyes wide and blinking. She  
looked around the room as if she had never seen it before.  
Then she turned her blue-ice eyes on Mulder.  
  
"Mulder?" she asked querulously.  
  
He sat back down and grasped her hand again. "You had a  
nightmare, do you remember it?"  
  
She shuddered violently. "Unfortunately."  
  
"Do you want to talk about it?" His clear hazel eyes looked  
into hers, with a silent addendum. *You can trust me.*  
  
She took in a hitching breath. "We were in the hospital,"  
she started. "I mean, you were in the hospital and I was   
trying to treat you," she corrected absently.  
  
Mulder smiled ruefully. "Not exactly an uncommon thing."  
  
She didn't smile back. "You were--" she stopped, her eyes  
filling with tears. "You were dying and there was nothing  
I could do about it."  
  
He moved his other hand so he had her own hand in both of  
his. Softly he rubbed his thumb over her palm as she   
collected herself and went on.  
  
"There was nothing I could do, and you were in so much pain.  
I had painkillers and I was ready to give them all to you,"  
she stopped with a muffled sob.  
  
Mulder felt his eyes fill at his partner's distress. But  
he let her go on uninterrupted.  
  
"And he was there with medicine," she continued. Mulder  
didn't need to ask who *he* was. *He* had been dead for  
almost six hours by then. Shot by Scully in a lonely cabin.  
  
"He told me that I could give it to you, and you'd live.  
But I wouldn't do it," she gasped through the tears that  
were running freely now. "I wouldn't do it because it wasn't  
a part of my science, and I took the needle and I killed  
you," she cried in a fit of agitation. "I killed you   
because I couldn't believe he could save you. And you died  
right in front of me."  
  
He felt a tear roll down his face and ignored it. Scully  
wasn't finished yet.  
  
"And as soon as you--you died," she stumbled over the  
word. "I was blinded. Just like I was in the house. I was  
blinded by my own arrogance," She said softly. "I killed you  
because of my arrogance," she finished.  
  
"Oh, Scully," was all Mulder could think of to say. Without  
another word he tugged gently at her hand.   
  
She wrapped her arms around his neck and started to really  
cry then, great cleansing sobs that shook her and in turn  
shook her partner.  
  
With soothing strokes Mulder rubbed her back until she had  
cried it all out. Then he spoke.  
  
"Scully, I know it was pretty freaky, but it was a dream.  
I know you well enough to know that it would never happen  
that way."  
  
She sniffled into his shirt but seemed to be listening.  
  
"I know from experience that you'd exhaust every last little  
option if it meant my life, just as I'd do for you. You  
aren't blind, Scully. The fact that you have a computer chip   
stuck in your neck to stave off cancer is a testament to  
that."  
  
"What if I miss something important because I'm too stubborn  
to see it?" she whispered.  
  
Suddenly, they weren't talking about medicine anymore.  
  
*Now how did that happen?* Mulder thought, wondering if this  
was something they should be delving into right then.  
  
If they didn't, wasn't that blindness too?  
  
"If you recognize that you're stubborn, then you can see  
past it," Mulder declared. "You can look beyond yourself."  
  
"Or maybe, look inside yourself," Scully added tentatively.  
  
"Most definitely," Mulder agreed.  
  
Scully pulled back a little to look him in the eye.  
  
"If I see something, but don't do anything about it, then  
that's blindness," she stated.  
  
Mulder nodded agreement. "And if I see something and deny  
it, that's blindness too."  
  
"Then we're both guilty," Scully said, still watching his  
eyes for signs that they were talking about the same thing.  
  
Mulder smiled softly. "Sometimes it takes a lot of tears to  
clean away the cataracts."  
  
"I think we've had enough tears to do the job," Scully   
said, mentally urging him to take the step that she could  
not seem to make herself.  
  
He took the hint.   
  
They were inches away from each other. With the slightest  
motion, Mulder's lips met Scully's.  
  
It was so much like the kiss on New Year's Eve, and yet they  
was as different as darkness and light.  
  
It started out chaste. Then, at the point where it had ended  
before, it grew instead. They tasted each other as if for  
the first time, as if for the last.   
  
When they finally broke it, they were both breathing hard.  
  
And they were both crying again.   
  
"Tears again, Mulder?" she said gently.   
  
He traced her cheek with his palm. "You too, Scully."  
  
*Tears help us to see clearly,* he thought as she snuggled  
against his body. With a contented sigh, they laid back on  
the bed and drifted away into sleep.   
  
**********  
  
Like it? Let me know what you thought! PitaM13@cs.com  
check out my other fanfic at the X-Files Archive.  
http://fly.to/XFArchives  
  



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